A Prison of Possessions

Chipping away at our things. We now have four boxes of books sitting out in the garage. We are bringing them to a used book store that will give us a bit of money for each book.

By going through our books, we've found that we actually own duplicate copies of several books, and in some cases series of books. Safe to say, we love books, and it's hard to part with them. I'm saving the books I really love, the ones that dramatically impacted my life. I'm letting go of the rest.

A Paralyzed Life

I don't want to spend my life going to work.

I don't know why that is such a radical idea.

It's not that I'm lazy. It's that I'm not a hamster. I don't want to spend my life circling the same five square miles that I was born in.

This planet is amazing, and I want to see it.

There are interesting people, and I want to meet them. Different foods that I want to try.

Renting house, getting rid of stuff, shipping mast

Renting Out The House

We've been going back and forth on how we want to rent out our house. Initially we thought we would rent to a friend or family member. More of a "house sitter" type situation, and just ask for enough money to cover the property taxes and insurance.

Renting to friend/family would take the pressure off getting rid of all our things - which is more challenging than I thought it would be!

Cruiser Coaching

Cruiser Coaching

Going cruising is a really scary thing. It can be really nice to have someone there to cheer you on, or maybe just tell you that you're not crazy. If you need some help I'm offering coaching. Fill out the following form to get started:

Here are a few things my wife and I can help you with:

Encouragement

Becoming a vagabond is a scary idea. You’re going against the grain of society. Giving up a large portion of your personal possessions. Leaving behind family and friends. There is the fear of the unknown and the “what ifs”. Those around you may be excited for you, but it’s also nice to have someone to talk with who has been there before, and can encourage you through your journey.

Spouse Reassurance

Perhaps your spouse (husband or wife), has concerns, and they just need to hear some reassurance from someone who is not you. Maybe your spouse is tentative about the idea of cruising on a sailbot, and would feel more excited after talking to someone who has actually done it. Maybe your spouse just wants to have a conversation with someone of the same sex.

Budgeting

How much money do you need? How do living expenses on a boat differ from land based living expenses? Will you be spending less or more money? What opportunities are there for making money along the way? My wife and I have lived on a boat as college students with no income, as business owners with steady high income, and as contract employees with moderate income. We’ve lived aboard with kids, and without.

Sailing, Navigation, and Seamanship

Are you worried about the skills and experience you need to go on your adventure? Do you have questions about navigating unfamiliar water? Plotting courses? Are you concerned about thunderstorms? Tides? Where to anchor for the night? Are you prepared for heavy weather? We can help you make a plan.

Destinations And Route Planning

Should you sail offshore to the Caribbean or take the Inner Coastal Waterway (ICW)? Are you thinking about the Great Loop? Maybe you're interested in a transatlantic passage to the Mediterranean? How should you travel to avoid burn out?

Boat, Equipment Selection, and Preparation

Power or sail? Monohull or multihull? What is the right size boat? How much holding for freshwater, fuel, and waste? Do you need solar panels? A radar? Autopilot? A spare for every part? You can go broke outfitting a boat, I’ve also seen people get caught in an endless cycle of always preparing and never departing. Don’t be one of them!

Living

Laundry, Grocery shopping, Boat repairs and maintenance, showers, what it's really like... etc!

3 reasons I'm afraid to sail away

I Worry About The Unkown

My youngest son, Charlie is 1.5 years old, and still wakes up fairly often in the middle of the night. Whenever I'm in his dark room, standing over his crib, shushing him back to sleep, I think about how happy I am that we are not living on a sailboat.

I think about how nice it is that I'm not in a strange place, a thousand miles from home. I think about how comfortable my house is. How it can't sink. I think maybe I don't want to sail away. Maybe we should just stay home. It's SUCH a comfortably tempting thought to think.

But when I really embrace this idea, it falls apart. So we don't go sailing. Then what? Do I go to work and keep up with the Joneses? Two weeks vacation once a year. Is that it? Is that what I want to do with my life? Absolutely not.

Do I want to look back on my life and think "I chose comfort and familiarity over living the life I really wanted." No way.

I Worry About Money

I spend most of my time worrying about money. It's the most pressing issue, and in a lot of ways it's the easiest to solve compared to intangible things like "the fear of the unknown."


My concerns start with health insurance. When we were younger, life didn't cost as much money. We needed food for two and gas money for the boat. That was about it.

Now we are a family of four, and its our responsibility to look out for the well being of our children. I consider health insurance for all of us to be a necessity.

I'm hoping that I'll be able to keep my current job in some form. Just in case that doesn't work out, I've started a web design and management company called Wowie.co (please check it out, and tell your friends). The company has been really successful so far, but it's still a candle in the wind. I'm also experimenting with revenue streams from this blog, which I will share updates on in a later post. We also plan to rent out our house.


While I worry about money, it's not a reason to give up the sailing dream. Cruising has provided me with many skills (self-confidence, problem solving, budgeting) and even opportunities. My current job and income is directly connected to our 2007-2009 sailing trip. So who knows. Maybe this new adventure will result in new income streams I currently can't imagine.

I Worry About Uprooting My Family

I have a lot of wonderful memories of growing up. My parents have lived in the same house for as long as I can remember. Living in a house provides a lot of interior room to run and play. I remember playing catch with my dad in our back yard. Riding skateboards and bikes in our driveway. I have a lot of wonderful (and horrible) memories from going to school, and there are people here in Muskegon that I've known since the first grade.

I'm afraid to pull my kids away from the wonderful childhood I had. I know Hobie in particular is going to miss our house. He is going to miss our cats (which we are going to have to find new homes for).


On the flip side, I don't know how great it can be to grow up on a boat because I didn't experience it the way my kids will. They will make their own special memories. They will see and experience things that other kids don't.

Ultimately, I don't think there is a "right way". I think (hope) that my kids will look back on their childhood and view it as "normal" because it is simply the only one they know. I mean, the idea of growing up in India is totally exotic to me. But to the kids who grow up there, it's just normal.

You Only Live Once

Whatever my fears, I always come back to two things:

1. My life is going to go by faster than I would like it to.

2. I don't want to spend my life working.

I'm not opposed to work. I'm a straight up workaholic. But I'm always asking myself "when I'm old and looking back on my life, what do I want to see? A life spent working, making money? Or a life spent making memories, experiencing as much as I can of this amazing world where we live?


I think everyone tricks themselves into thinking "there will be time later." But... there won't be. This is it. Life slips by like sand through your fingers. Ask any old person and they will say "each year goes by faster than the one before."

I can't help but feeling life doesn't really want to be lived. It's like the buzz of a refrigerator, the ambient noise that no one notices until it suddenly cuts out. It's easy to take for granted.

You have grab life by the throat. Don't let it slip away. You only get one shot, so make it count.

To hell with it. Let's sail away!

We're getting ready to sail away. There is no other way for me to put it. We know when we are leaving (fall, 2017) and we know where we are going (The Florida Keys), and after that... unknown.

I've been dreaming about this for YEARS. So it's weird that I'm not more excited. Don't get me wrong, I'm totally excited. I'm also more terrified than I thought I would be. The fear is a total buzz kill.


First off, we didn't arrive at the decision to sail away under the happiest circumstances. The original plan was to sail off in the fall of 2018, and be back in the Bahamas for our 10 year wedding anniversary. That sounds like a great plan, except I'm losing my god damn mind in Muskegon.

I just can't fathom another year and a half of my life in it's current form. The thought of it makes me boil from the inside out. It makes me slump into depression.


Somewhere along the way, I read, heard, or came to the conclusion that happiness is inside you. And if you are not happy where you are, then you will not be happy where you are going. Happiness is a state of mind. You can't find it with GPS coordinates. Or can you?


My life here is not all that bad. By many standards, it's above average. But that doesn't mean it's right for me. I never wanted a routine life. Commuting to work each day. Having a house with nice things. No thanks. Life should not be about going to work. I get that we all need money and everything, but the meaning of life is not to go to work. At least not for me. I don't want to be laying on my deathbed looking back on my life and thinking "well, I lived in Muskegon and I went to work and made some money and bought some things. That's what I did." To hell with that.


This life I'm living, it's not my real life. My real life is on pause. At least that is what I've been telling myself for the 8 years its been since we stopped living on a sailboat. But how long does it take for this land-based life to become my "real one?"

I worry that the further we get from living on a boat, with every year that passes, it will become all that much harder to go back. I worry that I'll end up stuck in this life forever. I feel stuck already. Trapped. I'm worried my life is going to become an accident. That I will end up living out a suburban life I never wanted.

And so, losing my mind, struggling with depression, I convinced LeeAnn that we should sail away a year early.